2012: A Review and Resolution

I've accomplished a lot this year. I somewhat met some goals, I went through some heavy stuff, and survived the end of the world! I'm very proud of how far I have gone and how much more i'm going to accomplish in the coming year. I really do think this was the best year ever and being 21 has been pretty fun. Being 21 seriously is a blast and I won't stop living my life to the fullest.

2013 starts off in a few hours and I got some resolutions:


1) Be a better cook:

I have been cooking for the past month because my parents have been away. I'm pretty decent at fixing myself my own dinner. I actually am making dinner tonight for a party that i'm attending tonight. I'd like to get better with cooking so I could cook decent dinners for my mother and for other parties that I may be invited to in the near future. Also, i'm quite the baker too!

2) Get my career kick-started:

I am currently studying chemistry. I'm going to graduate college in about 1.5 years. I'm excited, but, I have to figure out my plan. I'm going to be applying to some internships that will help me develop skills in the chemistry field. I will also start talking to more people so I could possibly have job opportunities in the near future.

3) No dating:

I realized that I don't have time for a boyfriend. I'm almost done with college and I refuse to allow someone else to treat my heart like monkey meat (something that Hannah from GIRLS once said).

4) Modeling:

I'd like to do one modeling gig at least once this coming year. I do love my body very much and i'm sure someone can appreciate my looks. I am not the prettiest flower, but I do think I have some good features and that takes a lot of confidence to say that and accept it!

5) Travel:

I kind of like traveling. I think i'd like to make a once a year thing. God knows where i'll go, but anywhere that is not home is good. Yes, going back to Canada would be nice.

That's about it. I'll try to keep up with these resolutions, but i'm bound to break them. Or as the GIRLS 2nd season promo says (and with a hashtag): #ResolutionsGIRLSbreak

Favorite Film, 2012

(I'm vague, bare with me).

So many movies that I was VERY fond were released this year. I anticipated the releases of The Avengers, The Dark Knight Rises, and The Hobbit: An Unexpected Journey. However, neither of these movies attracted my attention like Moonrise Kingdom. When I first saw the trailer in November or December 2011, I was so excited! I squealed in my chair and became incredibly impatient. I didn't get to see it in theaters, but was finally able to see it at home on DVD.

I’ve been a Wes Anderson fan since high school. The movie that won me over was Rushmore. I love the plots that each Anderson film has. There’s always a hint of tragedy and sadness, but there’s always a twist that ultimately becomes very hilarious. Moonrise Kingdom was no different. Except, this was a little different for me. First of all, this movie took place in the 1960’s (1965 to be exact). I have always had a fascination with the 60’s, and the best part is that you’re taking the era and placing it in a 12 year old’s perspective. The film revolves around two 12 year old kids, Sam Shakusky and Suzy Bishop, who run away and fall in love. The thing is though, they can’t get very far since this film takes place in a small New England island. Whatever happens, everyone will know. The major plot revolves around the friendship that Sam and Suzy develop and then the minor plots that are occurring, such as a giant storm heading towards the island or how every minor character somehow finds their lives to be miserable, but still trying to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Sam and Suzy have their own forms of misery, but the fact that they could understand each other is what allows them to be happy to the point where they want to be together (perhaps, forever).

Young love at its best. I think what really attracted some individuals to the film was the tune “Le Temps de l’Amour” by Francoise Hardy, which was used for the trailer. The song is used within the film as well, and it really is a huge significance, and in my opinion, really defines the entire point of the movie. When I listen to the song, I can’t help but think of the scene in which Sam and Suzy declare their love, dancing and first kisses, something that we all like to remember every now and then.

Wes Anderson never fails to disappoint. His color schemes, the cinematography, the motifs that he uses are always a treat for myself and possibly other fans. I really did enjoy that he did take us back to the 60’s, the Summer of Love. I do highly recommend this movie. It will not disappoint.

Because on Christmas...

...You always tell the truth


I like doing posts towards the end of the year in which I confess stuff that I would like to tell people. Except the only catch, I don't reveal who you are in which I want to say these things to. Nonetheless, these are my confessions from me to you, and they are coming from the bottom of my little heart. Even if some stuff isn't that nice.

1) Sometimes I do think you disappear too often. You're there, but you're not always there. I think that thing that reconfirms that you are in my life is when we have our moments together. I don't think you're very comfortable with the idea of our moments after a while, but i'd like to think that these small moments we have define our friendship, and how these such things make me want you to stay in my life for as long as you can.

2) You do anything and everything for me. I'm so happy that I have you in my life and that you still haven't left my life. I sometimes just want to put you in my pocket so that way I could keep you around forever and ever. 

3) Your secret will always be safe with me. I'm trying to forget about it, but I haven't told anyone and I don't plan to. I really think it's awesome to know you and i'll always have a place in my brain when I try to remember you and the things you say; In the end, you always make me laugh.

4) I miss you. I sometimes long to hear from you, but again, I only wish you the best on such social websites because I can and I feel like it. There's never going back.

5) I hate how you were once a part of my life and then not let me be a part of yours when you head and heart become preoccupied. I'm not sure what your intentions are, but your actions confirm that you should not be a part of  my life. 

6) I hope you're always there. I've never had a person that could be so positive and understanding about my decisions. It's nice having someone like that in my life.

7) All my life, there you go, oh please, just this once anyways

Album of the Year, 2012

I always pick the one album that I have liked best out of the entire year. Many great albums came out, but there could only be one that I absolutely loved and can listen to all the time without skipping songs. This album in particular is Barchords by Bahamas (aka Afie Jurvanen).

Everyone has a different take on albums and songs. Though, to me, this album is a concept album. An album of being in love and losing that person that you love. The opening track “Lost in The Light” has this very powerful lyric that sometimes makes me well up and breaks my heart. “before we were lovers, I swear we were friends.” On a personal note, I went through a break-up. Yes, I may have not been with this person very long, but in a way, I was so emotionally attached to them, and the day that person and I ended our relationship was just a very powerful impact. I did my best to cope through it, but when I listen to “Lost in the Light”, it just reminds me how I long to see this person and be with them, but it’s just not possible.

As you continue to listen to the album, it becomes slightly upbeat and you try to understand the singer’s (Afie’s, perhaps) POV of his love and loss. “Caught Me Thinking” makes me feel all the “what if’s” of a relationship. I definitely had a lot “what if’s” and truth be told, I still have plenty of those. “Montreal”, an acoustic tune, reflects the doubts that the person felt when they started the relationship, the relationship ended, and then the person wants their loved one back, and in a way, pleading not to give up on them. Hinting, I suppose, to wait for them and they’ll be a better person to be with.

“Okay Alright I’m Alive” reflects and expresses “Yeah, the relationship ended, but I’m okay! I could do without this person!” I’m pretty sure that this happens to a lot of people after their break-ups. You feel awful, then you a hit point where you think everything is okay and you don’t need this person. The upbeat feel of this song then comes down to a very mellow spot with “Never Again.” The tune reflects the fact that you let that person go and that you will never be with them again. I hold this tune very close to me because of the choices I have made and I’m sticking with them; I refuse to go back. “Overjoyed” continues the mellow flow, where the person expresses that this person frees them from the pain, but in a sense longs for them. As you listen to the album, you really begin to understand that the person has lost this person and emphasizes in the song “I’ve Got You Babe”. You once had this person, you held them, and then you lost them for whatever reason it could be.

This record takes a pause from the loss aspect with “Any Other Way.” When I first heard it I was happy because the person reflects that their loved one is expecting a bundle of joy and expresses that he’ll be so happy with the baby and his loved one because they’ll be together as a family. Though, I think this could all be in the person’s head and just imagines things being this way.

Of course, this album is supposed to express wanting someone back after losing them. “Snow Plow” deeply expresses how much they loved this person and how much they miss them. It reflects the kind of love this person gave them and towards the end, it questions if love itself can last forever.

“Your Sweet Touch” was my Summer tune of 2012. The first time I heard this song was when I went to visit Toronto to go see my dearest friend. Whenever I listen to this song, I reflect heavily on how much I wanted this person. The song expresses the desire and passion that they have for their loved, and how they long for their touch, even if won’t be for a long time, but just to be touched and to be desired by them would be suffice.  The guitar solo towards the end of the song makes me picture of having a moment of passion with the person and just being happy that you get to be theirs, if only just for those short moments.

“Time And Time Again” is an acoustic poem. Expressing how “time and time again” you think of this person and all the possibilities that could’ve been in the relationship, despite that it’s actually over. Lastly, “Be My Witness”, the last track of the album, is an expression of words that you want to tell your loved one. You want them to know everything you’ve felt, they want to know how you’ve felt, and pondering on the possibility if they could ever be together, possibly forever. It’s only a possibility, maybe it’s just in his head. Then again, these are the thoughts that props into someone’s head when a break-up occurs and you’re just left with the aftermath.

This is my take on the album. It could be wrong for all I know, but I’ve always believed that music can be interpreted in so many ways, and this my interpretation. This album did help me cope and deal with the break-up. I’m still trying to get over it, but I like to take it one day at a time.

And if this person that I once cared so much about reads this:

I don’t hate you, I could never hate you. You brought so much joy into my life even if it was short-lived. You were probably the best thing that ever happened to me. I do things for my well-being and with sincerity, I wish you the best in everything.